So I saw this ad. Free 304 V8. I was like "holy crap, that's the same engine I have!"
Disregarding the warnings of my friends that it was some serial killer who used to be bullied by a guy in high school who had a 304 V8, I went ahead and worked out a time to go pick it up. Since my truck is a little sketchy, I loaded up my truck with extra oil, anti-freeze, tools, and aired up the tires. I started the trip with 250 miles of fuel left to go (the gauge doesn't work, but I refill every 300mi, I have gone as far as 320, I have also gone as far as running out of gas many times).
So I first had to drive down to Rio Rico, AZ. As far as I was concerned that is like going to the moon in my truck. See the map and some pictures of my journey along the way:
So I got to the guy's house and he wanted me there before noon, because he is a Border Patrol agent (probably my age) and works the night shift. Anyways we talked about jeep parts, engines, and such while assembling the engine hoist. We then got the hoist together, hooked up the engine, lifted it, and wheeled it over in the garage so I could back under it. We wrestled with the engine and iteratively backed up the truck and lifted. We had to remove my tailgate to get it in the rest of the way. Finally the engine was in, we disassembled the hoist, had an awkward moment over tool ownership (mechanic thing), and he threw in some extra parts to boot. He mentioned that he threw away some seat risers (that is a story coming up) a week ago which was grievous news to me. We laughed about my scary truck, and the long journey ahead of me. I strapped everything down (as much as you can strap down an 800lb chunk of steel + 300 lb engine hoist in a 1/4 ton truck) and headed out. Did I mention I had to pee so bad during all this I could barely concentrate on the task at hand? I didn't want to be the "creepy craigslist bathroom guy." So as soon as I left, I drove like a mile down the road and then went in the bushes, I guess if he drove by I would've been the "creepy craigslist peeing on the side of the road guy." You can't win.
I then started my trek out to Three Points, AZ. The truck handled like a boat with the suspension bottomed out. I no longer merged, I was "coming about," I no longer turned left or right, it was now "port" and "starboard," respectively. So I tried to keep my speed under 56 knots, even while on the freeway.
I stopped and ate at this restaraunt that was a giant cow skull. It was across from a place called "Cow Palace." I have eaten at the cow palace when I was much younger, but never inside the Longhorn Grill. Fortunately, it wasn't the Longhorn Grille, so pretentious--get that bleu cheese away from my burger. Ok the burger was so greasy it saturated the bun and the bun was slippery and soggy. The patty was like an inch thick, but cooked medium-well. I ordered mushrooms and onions on it and a dr pepper. Should I include this business lunch in the jeep budget? How about the many cases of garage beer? Hey I was thinking about something the other day. In Aldous Huxley's Brave New World, the pre-formed class of society called the Deltas and Gammas (from what I remember) are set out to do menial work. When their embryos are formed, they are injected with alcohol to make them effectivey dumber (or simpler, whatever) so that they enjoy menial work. The more menial work the class does, the more alcohol their embryo is administered. I think the same holds true for the fully-formed embryo, a human being. The fries were good too.
